My Guardian Angels

With constant testing, examination and treatment, I have become very weary of this illness. However, it's so encouraging knowing My Guardian Angels are participating in my care. The spiritual vehicle used by God to assign comforters, defenders, care givers and protectors for us can not be casually dismissed as irrelevant. For I believe that God chooses mortals as guardian angels, too. So it's the spiritual guardian angel and the mortal ones that live in our presence. God breathes life into both and each has a role in my care.

Unseen, spiritual angels can be difficult to comprehend when my faith is shakey. Knowing and believing opens our hearts to God's power and goodness. They connect me to God more than I deserve. We do see through our own eyes the faces of our mortal care giver angels. Some are so familiar that we don't think of them as angels, at all. Rather, they are medical staff, family and friends who treat us with care, encouragment, compassion and prayer. I can not do this struggle without you all. You are worthy of my highest praise and gratitude.

We have been at home for eight days and I'm feeling better. My appetite is coming back, but my strength has not gotten much better. After spending five weeks in Houston hotels and the MDA Hospital, being in our own surroundings has giving me a renewed appreciation for "home". I love our supporters who call, visit and provide us meals and gifts. Their presence gives us warmth and comfort. Getting local church and community updates from our friends and loved ones is a blessing to both of us.

I'm taking several strong antibiotic, antiviral and antifungal medicines. My body is weak as a result. Dizziness and unstable walking is my latest issue. I'm using a cane to help with my balance as I move about. Often, I get winded from doing simple tasks, like showering, shaving, brushing my teeth, etc. When I stand for more than 5 to 10 minutes my body gets weak and my breathing gets labored. I want to believe the strong medicines are causing most of my issues. However, fighting and preventing infection is of utmost importance, so I continue following my medical team's advice, for the most part.

Four days from now we go back to Houston for my second round of chemo treatment. We do not look forward to this trip. If all goes as hoped, we may be back home in about a week. Since the chemo I will be taking is lower in strength than my first round of treatments, I hope my recovery is easier. If not, our stay my be longer than a week.

Finally, my Angel Janine has sacrificed much of her normal life for the past seven months caring for me. Her strength, demanding presence and constant care giving is a beauty to behold. She gives me all my necessary home medical care from getting my medicines organized and administered to changing my PIC line caps and dressings. She has administered chemo shots, as well. None of this comes easy to her, but she does the necessary things to keep me on the healing path. She still finds time to do all the household chores we both used to do. She does it all! My illness defeats me without her love and care. Angelic solider she remains. I Love You.